


Maybe Someday

by SkyPrincessCommanderBadass



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fix-It, Lexa's alive, post-3x16
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-17 22:17:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9348803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkyPrincessCommanderBadass/pseuds/SkyPrincessCommanderBadass
Summary: Exhausted and Mourning, Clarke woke up with strong arms wrapped around her. She thought she's losing it, seeing Lexa because her brain is rejecting the fact that she's dead.What she did not know is that, Lexa had some help after she got shot, survived it and recovered for their 'maybe someday'OrAnother one of those fix it fic





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Need I remind you that I was drunk when I wrote this because I miss these gays so much.
> 
> Enjoy though!
> 
> XOXO
> 
> SkyPrincessCommanderBadass

Exhausted by the events that occurred, Clarke did not even notice that she's being carried by Bellamy from the Rover to an infirmary bed. Exhaustion finally got the best of her, today she almost died and the past few days have been so fast she did not even bother to sleep during those days after... Clarke can't even bring herself to think about it without breaking.

_I'll always be with you._

That's all Lexa had to say, nothing more, nothing less and it makes Clarke mad by the second that Lexa left her there. There's not much of a choice she knows that but she's still mad.

Her eyes are still closed but she can hear feet shuffling inside the well lit room. It's almost blinding even with the blonde's eyes closed. She felt familiar hands on her arm and she knew it was her mother.

"Rest, Clarke. I will hook you up to an IV. Get as much sleep as you can. You deserve that." Abby said and squeezed Clarke's arm.

Clarke dared a peak, it hurts her eyes as the light flood in. "Mom, don't." Clarke said weakly. "Don't waste IV bags. I can manage on my own, I just need to sleep."

"Clarke-" Bellamy argues.

"No, Bell. I'm fine. Just go." Clarke said, not intending to be harsh. The two immediately left, leaving Clarke with her fuzzy little brain, fragile emotions and exhausted body. Clarke sobbed, finally giving up the bottled emotion she cannot shed with people around. She longed for the earthy smell of a certain brunette she will never see again. Her forrest green eyes, those strong arms that can wield swords but also be gentle on touching her, and her heart, so ruthless but full of love, for her people and for Clarke, the heart that stopped when she was not able to save her.

She hated Lexa for leaving in Mount Weather, for choosing her people over Clarke but she hated herself more for doing the same in the City of Light, for saving everyone, choosing them and let Lexa die for the second time. She could have helped but no she did not because she knows even if they did won against Jaha and Alie there is no guarantee that she'll get to keep the Commander. And now another threat is coming, Clarke decided she'll worry about that tomorrow.

"Warriors only mourn their dead when the battle is over." Clarke had to wipe her eyes before turning to see Octavia by the doorway.

"Thought you left." Clarke mumbled weakly.

"I did. but you need to know the truth." Octavia said. Clarke's confused of what that statement means.

"What is it?" Clarke's heart is banging against her chest, she cannot have a moment of peace, problems over problems.

"Lexa." Octavia said.

"What about her?" Clarke gulped, her tears brimming on her eyes.

"She's alive."

Clarke laughed bitterly at that. "If Raven put you up to this, tell her it worked. It's funny." Clarke turned away.

"Whatever, Clarke. I told you the truth, now I'm leaving. If you don't believe me, not my problem." She heard the younger girl leave the infirmary, seeing is believing, she saw Lexa's body, she saw her die, there is no way that would be true.

Clarke sighs and decided to deal with Raven in the morning. She knows she's the one who put Octavia up to that. Sleep finally came and Clarke grabbed it immediately, hoping for a moment of peace, away from everything.

 

* * *

Clarke felt strong arms wrapped around her middle, heart beat on her back and breath touching the back of her neck.

"Mom, I'm fine. You didn't have to stay." Clarke mumbled hearing a familiar chuckle from behind. Clarke's eyes flew open and she tensed when she saw that the arms wrapped around her wasn't her mother's.

"Hello, Clarke." Lexa greets. Clarke turned around and saw the Commander smiling at her. Clarke can't believe what she is seeing, she can't even put herself to believe this, because maybe she's losing it, she might be going crazy.

"Is this a dream?" Clarke asked. Lexa only chuckled at that.

"Because if it is, please don't wake me up." Clarke felt Lexa wipe a tear that fell.

"Do you want this to be a dream?" Lexa asked.

"No."

"Good. Because it isn't." Lexa replied, Clarke wanted to believe, Lexa's here, she can hear her, touch her, see her and smell her but that doesn't mean that she's real.

"I'm losing it." Clarke told her.

"No, you are not. I'm here, I'm alive." Lexa said, caressing Clarke's back.

"I saw you die, I saw Titus brought you out of the room, I saw Aden mourn over your fallen body." Lexa smiled again, she propped herself using her elbow, Clarke clutched her shirt immediately never wanting for Lexa to be further away.

"I'm not going anywhere, Clarke." She lay back down and held her close, her head resting on Lexa's chest. She's listening to its steady beating.

"How can you put me in that pain, Lex? I thought you're dead." Clarke muttered weakly, fisting Lexa's shirt, tears flowing free.

"For 'maybe someday'" Lexa whispered as if that's enough explanation. "So I can be with you."

Clarke chuckled bitterly "That's the most selfish thing you did, Lexa. So out of character."

"You have every right to be angry, if you want me to go, I can. You want a knife on my throat, I'm alright with that. I can wait, just like last time. Just say the word and I'll respect your wishes. As long as it takes." Clarke landed a punch on Lexa's shoulder but the brunette just took it thinking she deserved that.

"I could have died! Luna would have had me killed! The flame would have taken my life! And here you are, you went out of whatever fucking cave you came in and tell me you did that for me?!" Clarke was furious, she just hits Lexa repeatedly but never wanting her to go further away.

"I never meant for those things to happen. I know it is selfish, but this is me choosing you, Clarke."

"Bullshit. You just want out of the trouble, I get that but I am the one who got all of it." She pushed Lexa away now, the brunette then stood up, ready to leave.

"I'm sorry." She said before leaving, Clarke felt her heart clench at the sound of Lexa's footsteps going further away from her.

Clarke cried herself to sleep once again, she doesn't know how else she could survive with these emotional roller coaster.

 

* * *

 

Clarke woke up sometime in the middle of the night, thinking if Lexa really was there or was she imagining that for closure. The blonde stood up, legs aching in protest but she ignored it as she laced her boots up. She looks at the nearby mirror and was startled by how horrible she looks. Black blood on her nose, hair disheveled, drying blood on her chest from her mother's scalpel, dirty clothes then she saw a bump on her fitted top, she remembered that she kept the flame there.

She took it out and looked at it, it still bloodied with black and red. At one point she thinks it's all a dream that she can wake up from but the flame is one proof that it isn't unlike Lexa's visit from earlier that day and Clarke told herself that if she's losing her mind, at least it was Lexa who she is seeing.

She walked out of the infirmary with the hopes of finding another peaceful place to summon Lexa but she didn't have to, the commander is already there, sitting on the floor asleep. Lexa looked normal in Arker clothing and losing those intricate braids, she looked even younger. Clarke wonders if her brain already manifested this version of Lexa before she finds a peaceful place.

The blonde sat down beside her, it woke Lexa up making her jump away from Clarke.

"Whoa, Lex. It's me." Clarke said, hands placed in front of her for defense.

"You scared me, Clarke." Lexa sounded apologetic, the last part though sounded like a prayer to her.

The brunette sat down beside her, leaving a few spaces knowing that Clarke isn't comfortable with her. The blonde moved closer, close enough for her to feel the warmth that is coming from Lexa's body then she held Lexa's hand.

She chuckled "You feel so real, I'm really losing it." Clarke said.

"You're not going insane, Clarke. I'm alive." Lexa begs for the blonde to understand.

"Whatever, I just don't want you to go." She whispered. "If being crazy means I get to see you then it wouldn't be as half bad as I think it is." She squeezed Lexa's hand.

"Clarke." Lexa sighed. "Please, I'm alive." Emerald eyes begging to be understood.

"No, you're not, Lexa. You died on my arms, Roan burned your body at the top of the tower."

"It wasn't mine, the body was Nia's. He told me about Ontari's plan and he wanted a proper goodbye to his mother. I gave him that, he needed a body to burn to prove his loyalty to Ontari and he needed to say goodbye to his mother." Clarke still cannot believe, her brain is one hell of a story writer.

"How are you alive then? What changed?" Clarke asked, suddenly curious of what else can her brain make up.

Lexa just shrug, the brunette did not even know how she survived a bullet wound. She just remember being woken up by her own determination, because it hurts to see Clarke cry over her death. She lay lowed for a while, Roan her best ally, he chased Clarke to protect her when things went to shit after she died. She mourned over fallen nightbloods, her legacy that wouldn't be passed on, Luna and her are the last ones. Her duty to her people isn't done after all.

Clarke stood up and took Lexa with her, the brunette did not argue, she just walked beside Clarke silently as they trailed going to Clarke's quarters. The looks that Clarke gets from the people is getting in to her, they look like they saw her back from the dead. Raven was outside the quarters, the relieved look fell when her eyes went straight from Clarke to Lexa.

"You're alive." Raven muttered, Clarke had to chuckle at that. "Of course, Rae. I defeated Alie remember?" Clarke answered sarcastically.

"No, you idiot. Lexa I mean!" Clarke's eyes widen at that. "You can see her?!" Clarke asked.

"Duh? I have been under Alie's spell, I know what's real and not. And I'm pretty sure this commander isn't like an Alie manifestation." Raven explained. Clarke's mouth is still open, still surprised at Raven seeing her Lexa.

"Anyway, I just wanted to know if you are okay. Looks like you are." Raven smirked, gesturing towards their intertwined hands. She walked past the couple and turned back around.

"And oh, if you're going to fuck her, please keep it down. People are still traumatized with the incoherent screaming."

"I'll keep that in mind, Raven kom Skaikru." Lexa answered after minutes of being silent. Clarke led her in to her sleeping quarters, pushed her up against the wall and devoured her waiting lips.

Clarke's kiss is urgent and heated like her life solely depends on it, Lexa kissed her back, not as heated and urgent but it sure did made Clarke's legs quiver.

"You're real." Clarke whispered when they separated to catch some air. Lexa's still pinned against the wall.

"Yes." Lexa answered, Clarke leaned her head on Lexa's shoulder and sobbed. "I want to understand, Lex. I need a concrete reason to hold on to."

"Am I not concrete enough?" Lexa asked, she wanted to skip the details of how she survived. Even she cannot believe what happened. Clarke shook her head in reply, that's when Lexa is convinced she had to, Clarke has to know.

Lexa sat Clarke down on to the small bed and she kneeled in front of her. "I don't really remember what happened. I just remembered that I woke up days after I was shot, in the drop ship."

"Roan and Titus, they made it possible, they sent you away with the flame because they know it will never be safe in Polis. Roan brought me to the drop ship and there I was healed. Octavia brought Doctor Jackson, he was an ally at first, he took good care of me until Roan knew that he's just doing that to get to the flame. He left immediately when he learned that I did not have it."

"From then on, I depended on myself and a few trusted friends like Echo, Indra and Octavia. I learned that my nightbloods died, and Titus too. I have no choice but to hide because I could be next. I never wanted for you to fight on your own, but I have no other choice but to hide and trust that you will do what's best for our people." Lexa caressed Clarke's face, kissing her tear streaked cheeks.

"And you did." Lexa added and smiled at Clarke.

"We have bigger problems, Lexa. Bigger than the ice queen and the fall of the Coalition." Clarke reminded her.

"I know. But tonight could be our short and peaceful 'maybe someday' " Clarke smiled at that.

"You maybe a selfish bitch for the past few days but I love you." Clarke said, Lexa's eyes widen at the sudden admission.

"I love you too." Lexa replied, placing a hungry kiss at Clarke's waiting lips. The threat of tomorrow still lingers through both their minds, Lexa had to face consequences of running away from her duty to her people and Clarke had to deal with the upcoming bigger threat but it doesn't matter now. They have each other for tonight, and the next day, and the next day and the next and that's how it will always be.

"Together." Lexa murmured on Clarke's lips, Clarke pulled away and stared Lexa in to the eyes, a simple word that meant so big to both of them.

"Together." Clarke replied and went back in to kissing Lexa. Enjoying the blissful and tiny piece of their 'maybe someday'

 


End file.
